My Father Died of Cancer
Hi,
It’s been almost 5 months since my father passed away. From everything being fine to him being gone took only 3 weeks. The cancer took him so quickly that it feels like my brain can’t comprehend it. I know he’s not here anymore, but sometimes it hurts so much that I can’t breathe. People don’t ask about it anymore, and I feel like I should be further along in my grief. I have good days where I’m happy, but I think about him many times every day. The longing is so great. I promised myself that because of this, I would live in the moment and be grateful for what I have. But it’s just so unfair.
From Me
Answer
Hello,
I’m very sorry to hear what happened to your father. I deeply sympathize with you, as I also lost my father to a brief battle with cancer.
The time afterward was very blurry for me too, and it felt like my world stood still while everyone else continued with their normal lives, which can be hard to deal with. I remember I had a hard time expressing my feelings and my grief in the months following, but I quickly realized that it was helpful for both me and my friends to talk about it when I was having a tough time, even though it can be hard to say it out loud.
I understand the feeling that you should be further along in your grief, but over time I learned that you can’t control the grieving process. Therefore, it’s perfectly okay to be sad even if it has been a while since the loss.
I’m glad to hear that you also have room and energy for some good days during this difficult time; I recognize that from my own experience as well.
I hope you are okay and that my response can offer some support. If not, you are, of course, very welcome to write again.
Good evening from one of the volunteers
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